Monday, December 15, 2025

1 am

 


At 1:00 a.m., the Mind Opens



I woke up to the sound of power fluctuating.


The electricity went on and off, and the air conditioner responded with a sharp, mechanical stutter. It wasn’t loud, but it was persistent enough to break through sleep. I checked the time. 1:00 a.m.


That detail stayed with me longer than it should have.


I remember thinking it felt deliberate—like my brain was searching for a reason to wake me. I switched off the main power to the AC and lay back down, waiting for my thoughts to settle.


They didn’t.


Almost immediately, a car outside began honking. Not the impatient honk of traffic, but something repetitive, insistent. Its headlights flashed on and off, throwing light across the wall I was facing. The room pulsed. I sat up, heart racing.


It felt staged. Too coordinated. As if my senses were conspiring against me.


A familiar fear crept in—the quiet kind that doesn’t announce itself but tightens your chest anyway. Was this happening, or was I assembling meaning out of noise again? I had been here before. That thought scared me more than the light.


I stood up and stared at the wall.


The shifting beams formed a pattern. Not random—not to me, at least. I saw a shape emerging, something that resembled a ship approaching land. The image felt complete, intentional. I couldn’t look away.


And then doubt arrived.


I asked myself the only question that mattered: Am I seeing this, or am I needing to see it?


The moment I questioned it, the image collapsed. The car drove away. The wall returned to being just a wall.


I went back to bed, lying still, replaying everything in forensic detail—searching for a mistake, a crack in logic, anything that would prove it was ordinary. Sleep came eventually, but it felt negotiated rather than natural.


The next morning, I messaged my guru. I didn’t dramatize it. I just described the facts.


Their response was calm.


When meditation deepens, the mind loosens its usual boundaries. Perception can become vivid. Don’t resist it. Don’t cling to it either.


That explanation felt safe—but incomplete. It explained everything and nothing at the same time.


I continued meditating.


Lately, I’ve been drawn to the sky more than usual. Not in a poetic way—more like a quiet compulsion. Staring upward gives me relief, as if my thoughts align themselves when there’s too much space to fill. Sometimes I feel oddly displaced, as though I’m slightly misfiled in my own life.


The next night, I woke up again at 1:00 a.m.


No power fluctuation this time. No honking. Just awareness—sharp and immediate. The symbol appeared again, clearer now, more detailed. It didn’t feel imposed; it felt generated. Like a thought I hadn’t consciously thought yet.


Images followed, layered and fluid. They didn’t frighten me as much as they should have. What frightened me was how natural they felt.


My mind rushed to explain it—to contain it.


Was this a message? A memory? A warning? Or was my brain, finally quiet enough, doing what it does best: finding patterns, filling gaps, constructing meaning where uncertainty lives?


I realized then that I didn’t want it to stop.


That was the most unsettling part.


I went back to sleep, unsure whether I was avoiding something or protecting myself from it.


Morning arrived, indifferent and ordinary. The world made sense again, which almost felt disappointing.


But I know this pattern now.


And part of me is waiting for 1:00 a.m. again.


To be continued…


Friday, December 12, 2025

M&A


After fifteen years apart, Maya and Arjun bumped into each other at the most unexpected place — a tech conference in Berlin.

She was presenting on AI ethics; he was demoing a blockchain-powered supply chain solution.

Their eyes met across the buzzing expo hall, and for a moment, the future paused to let the past catch up.

“Is that really you?” Arjun asked, smiling like no time had passed.

Maya laughed. “Still trying to save the world with code, huh?”


They ended up skipping the next two talks just to sit on a hallway bench, catching up over overpriced lattes.

She told him about her startup that failed gloriously and her quiet victory in academia.

He spoke of burnout, recovery, and the joy of building slow, meaningful tech.

The more they talked, the more it felt like picking up a sentence that had been paused mid-thought years ago.


That night, they walked through Berlin’s streets, the city lights reflecting off cobblestones like fragments of old memories.

They laughed over how they once fought over semicolon styles and who wrote cleaner code.

At midnight, a light rain started to fall, but neither of them made a move to go inside.

Instead, Arjun reached out, gently brushing a drop from her cheek.

“Some bugs,” he said, “are worth rediscovering.”


Maya rolled her eyes, but her smile betrayed her heart.

The next day, they skipped the conference altogether and took a train to nowhere in particular.

They talked about old dreams, new ones, and maybe starting something — this time, together.

By the end of the weekend, they had a joint GitHub repo and dinner plans for next Thursday.

It wasn’t just a spark.

It was a reboot.

Friday, December 5, 2025

A Chance on Coach S7


It was an early morning train to Coimbatore with my parents. The sun had barely risen, and I was already in a sulk. I had spent the entire morning fighting with my brother, irritated at everything and everyone. I didn’t even want to go on this trip. But my parents didn’t trust me to stay home alone — as if a sixteen-year-old couldn’t handle a couple of days by himself.


Feeling smothered and misunderstood, I climbed into the train and took the window seat, determined to shut the world out. I didn’t want to look at my parents, didn’t want to talk, didn’t want to be “family.” I was that angry.


The journey was long, so I leaned my head against the window, ready to sleep my frustration away. That’s when I heard someone shout, “Hello?”


I looked out and saw a girl on the platform, trying to get someone’s attention inside the same aisle. She looked confused and annoyed, struggling to make her way to what seemed like her parents. She wore a red frock, had short hair, and carried a gentle aura that almost softened the chaos around her.


Without thinking, I asked, “Do you want me to call them?”


She turned toward me. Her voice was soft, almost shy. For a moment, I just stared — something about her made me forget I was angry at the world.


The train lurched, and in seconds she vanished into the crowd of the platform. I sat back, oddly happier than I had been all morning. Maybe something good had happened.


I closed my eyes again and drifted until angry voices snapped them open. Passengers were fighting over a seat. I turned — and there she was again. The girl in the red frock had boarded the train. In my compartment.


My day instantly got better.


Eventually things settled down, and she found a window seat diagonally opposite mine. She didn’t smile, didn’t speak — just read a magazine, her face blank but beautiful. I kept sneaking glances, praying she wouldn’t catch me staring.


After a while, she got up and walked toward the door. I hesitated. Should I go? Was I being stupid? But a small voice in my head whispered, When will you ever get this chance again?


So I followed.


She was standing dangerously close to the edge of the open door, the wind pulling at her hair. My instincts jumped ahead of my brain — I reached out and tugged her back.


She spun around, annoyed.

“What is wrong with you? I was just looking!”


My face burned. No words came out. After a deep breath, I managed, “You were too close… sorry. Just looking out for you.”


She frowned.

“Why?”


I had no idea how to answer that.


So we both stared out the open door instead, silently sharing the wind and the tracks rushing beneath us. Her perfume drifted toward me — warm, soft, unforgettable.


Ten quiet minutes passed.


Then the train halted abruptly. We both grabbed the railing and looked at each other in surprise. I bent to peek out the door — and this time she pulled me back.


“You’re too close,” she said, mimicking my tone from earlier.


We burst out laughing.


After that, conversation flowed more easily — music, school, random dreams, silly fears. Time slipped past until her younger brother came looking for her. And just before leaving, she scribbled down her email ID on a tiny piece of paper.


“Email me,” she said.

And she was gone.




I emailed her the moment I got home.


She replied with long, thoughtful messages — about her aspirations, her fantasies, the things she never said out loud to her friends. We wrote to each other for a year, growing a strange, intense friendship across screens and stories.


Finally, we decided to meet.


A small coffee shop. A quiet corner.

She walked in — looking even more beautiful than I remembered. The red frock was gone, but the aura, the gentle presence, the warmth — all still there.


My heart couldn’t take it anymore. I blurted, “I have feelings for you.”


She paused, smiled softly, and said, “Thank you.”

We held hands and walked outside, just wandering, not saying much.


At the end of the evening, she stopped and looked at me with sadness in her eyes.


“I’m going abroad soon. I’d love to stay in touch… but just as friends.”


It broke my heart — quietly, painfully.


But she is still my friend. Maybe not what I hoped for. But still someone who walked into my life on an early morning train, in a red frock, smelling faintly of hope.


And some people, I guess, are meant to stay that way — beautiful, unforgettable, and just out of reach.